My Personality is Not Cube Shaped

I’m quite glad to see January gone, if I’m honest.  However, February doesn’t seem to be looking up any time soon. Now let me just say, this is not meant to be one of those whiny, “I hate my life” type posts but I do feel the need to be serious, sometimes.

January found my work life to be insanely dull and boring.  Two words which I loathe with a passion.  The entire month found me sitting at my computer, staring endlessly for hours on end, possibly sneaking a peek at Facebook (which I have to hack to get into) or reading the latest news story on Yahoo!.  I have to admit, the sheer boredom of January did give me some time to think about blog topics and allowed me to come up with some pretty decent articles but, I’m a pretty fast writer and it doesn’t take all that long to write 1000 words.  Besides, no one wants to read 1000 words 20 times a day.

I just can’t stand the endless days of nothing to do.  Boredom is one of my least favorite feelings in the world.  If I had it my way, I would be going 90 miles an hour all day, no time for breaks or lunches or even time to care that I didn’t get a lunch break that day.  But at the end of the day, the real problem is:

I hate Corporate America!

I hate being stuck in an office, I hate not having windows, I hate being indoors, sitting at the same desk day after day, staring at the same computer screen and the same people for weeks on end.  Some would probably look at my cushy office job and be jealous, and I guess those types of people would have every right to do so.  I’m not complaining about my job itself, I actually have it pretty good here.  No manager hanging over my shoulder, no irate customers to deal with, yeah, it’s a decent gig.

…if you like that kind of stuff.

Me?  I would much rather be outside working in the field somewhere.  One of my happiest moments was a couple months ago, when the winter actually decided to pop in for a spell (I don’t know about the rest of the world but winter pretty much decided that it didn’t want to visit Texas this year).  I was standing out in the blistering wind in 20 degree weather; that frosty, freezing, kind of mist blowing in my face, holding a water hose and waiting for the horses’ stock tank to fill up.  Everything about that moment was perfect.  It was cold, I couldn’t feel my fingers, water from the hose was trickling down into my boots, one of the horses had “slobbered on me”, and I was the happiest person in the world.

That’s just the way I am though.  Most people just don’t get it.  They think that since I’m a female I should be content with my little cubicle where there are no drastic changes in the weather.  They think I should be happy that I can get a pedicure at lunch time and come back and kick my shoes off and enjoy my pretty piggies.  They don’t understand that I would much rather be out in the wind and rain pounding T-posts into the ground and stringing wire as opposed to sitting behind a desk, answering e-mails all day.

I actually find myself getting angry with people when they say things like “well, you could be out in the cold doing manual labor!” or when they try to imply that they have it worse off than me because they are out in the elements.  First of all, this isn’t a contest to see who has it worse off than the other.  I’m sorry that you think you work harder just because you are doing physical work but I guarantee you that you have more energy than me at the end of the day.  Sitting, doing nothing, has to be the most exhausting work on the face of the planet.

Now, I know what you are all thinking.  “Sure, she THINKS this is what she wants to do but she’s been sitting behind a desk all her life and doesn’t have the first clue what it’s like to do manual labor.”

Oh my friends, you would be wrong.

I spent two summers in the ridiculously hot and humid Louisiana sun helping my parents re-build houses that had been damaged by hurricanes.  I’ve been on rooftops, I know the difference between three-tab and architectural shingles, I know what it’s like to paint an entire room, install windows, tape, bed, and texture, only to have the customer change their mind and have you do it all over again.  I’ve also been around the country lifestyle long enough to know how to pull calves, brand steers, and castrate hogs.  I’ve been soaked in water, covered in mud, drenched in paint, and always managed to find pleasure in my work.

I am the type of person that has to be able to see the results of the time and effort that I put into a project.  I think that’s probably what my biggest gripe with cube life is.  I spend my entire day tapping away at this keyboard, talking to people on the phone, and faxing page after page of endless reports just to do it the next day and never see any results.  I like to be able to see the beginning, middle, and end of a project and be able to differentiate which is which.

Perhaps I’m just being a bit whiny today but I just feel like I have done nothing but waste the last five years of my life.  I feel like I have accomplished absolutely nothing that is worthy of being proud of.  There is absolutely no challenge in my day to day, monotonous cube shaped world.  Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think that people who have and enjoy their jobs in the corporate world are lazy or un-productive, in fact, I’m glad there are people who are the opposite of me; the world would be in a whole lot of trouble if there weren’t those types.  It’s just not for me.


On a happier note…


I get to get my Watermelon Sweet Tea today!


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